How Prince Harry and Meghan Markle got together is a story that has been told by the couple many times, most importantly in their six-episode Netflix series and again in the blockbuster memoir Spare.
In the documentary, the pair gushed over their immediate connection and, in Spare, Harry wrote he was drawn to Meghan instantly due to her ‘angelic face’ and ‘wild joy’.
The smitten couple were put in contact through a mutual friend, and after years of theories of who the mysterious royal matchmaker was, it was confirmed in Spare that it was Harry’s childhood pal Violet Von Westenholz.
But despite her role as Cupid in their love story, Von Westenholz’s relationship with the couple seems to have cooled in recent years with her not having mentioned them since 2018.
Could it be that the person who introduced Harry to the ‘captain of his soul’ now plays only a little part in their lives?
Here MailOnline looks back at the relationship between the royal couple and their matchmaker Violet Von Westenholz.
Prince Harry’s childhood friend Violet Von Westenholz chats to Meghan Markle at Wimbledon on July 4, 2016. Meghan had already arranged to go on a second date with Harry that evening after being set up by Violet
The relationship between Von Westenholz (pictured in 2011) and the royal couple seems to have cooled in recent years
Von Westenholz played Cupid in Harry and Meghan’s (pictured in 2017) love story
Violet Von Westenholz has known Harry, 40, since they were teenagers through her father, the former Olympic skier Baron Piers Von Westenholz, who is a close friend of King Charles.
The baron is married to his second wife, Baroness Jane Von Westenholz, née Leveson. They have three children: Piers, Violet and Victoria.
Over the years, Violet would regularly travel with her family to join the Royal Family on skiing trips abroad, with Violet and Victoria becoming regular fixtures among the princes’ social set.
The baron was the head of his own antiques and interiors firm and was given the task of heading the interior redecoration of Dumfries House in 2007, which is where the operations of his King’s Foundation charity are based.
What’s more, her mother Jane Von Westenholz is a long-time friend of Queen Camilla and in 2022 it was announced that the baroness had been appointed one of her official ‘Queen’s Companions’.
There are only six Queen’s Companions who regularly attend events with Camilla or are able to formally represent her at official occasions.
The team have all been personally chosen by the Queen and have longstanding social links with her dating back decades.
Meghan with Violet Von Westenholz, together with Sadie Mantovani and Olivia Buckingham, at Wimbledon in June 2016, just before she was set up with Prince Harry
Violet Von Westenholz with Alexia Mavroleon, Princess Maria-Olympia of Greece and Denmark, Poppy Delevingne and Olivia Buckingham at a Christmas party in 2023
Meghan at the Polo Ralph Lauren VIP Suite at Wimbledon on July 4, 2016
Violet Von Westenholz at the Evian Celebrity Hospitality Marque at Wimbledon in June 2008
Meghan at Wimbledon on July 4, 2016. Later that night, she went on a date with Prince Harry, where she was given American-themed cupcakes to celebrate Independence Day
When Violet introduced Harry to his future bride, she worked as PR director for Ralph Lauren, a role she still has.
Through that job, she organised a publicity day for the brand at Wimbledon, which Meghan attended, allowing the pair to meet.
Following the event in July 2016, the actress uploaded a photo on her Instagram with the PR director and other guests.
Expressing her gratitude, Meghan captioned the post: ‘How much more could I adore this gem thank you Violet Von Westenholz’.
In Spare, the duke recounted coming across a video of the Suits star on Violet’s Instagram and being immediately drawn to her ‘angelic face’ – despite the pair using a funny dog filter.
‘I’d never seen anyone so beautiful,’ he said, saying it felt like a ‘punch in the throat’ because of Meghan’s ‘wild joy’.
The duke said the short clip stopped him in his tracks and he kept returning to it – before messaging Violet.
‘I sent Violet a message. ‘Who…is…this…woman?’ Harry wrote, before telling readers that she then linked him and Meghan together via Instagram.
Meghan and socialite Olivia Buckingham at the Polo Ralph Lauren VIP Suite at Wimbledon on July 4, 2016
After the release of Prince Harry’s memoir Spare , a royal fan shared a clip of Meghan and Suits co-star Sarah Rafferty using a dog filter
The couple also talked about the dog filter video in their explosive Netflix docu-series Harry and Meghan
Meghan then messaged Harry on the social media site, according to the memoir, before the pair exchanged numbers and eventually agreed to go on a first date.
After meeting Meghan, Harry wrote: ‘There was an energy about her, a wild joy and playfulness.
‘There was something in the way she smiled, the way she interacted with Violet, the way she gazed into the camera.
‘Confident. Free. She believed life was one grand adventure, I could see that. What a privilege it would be, I thought, to join her on that journey.’
Following their first date at Soho House, when Harry was 30 minutes late, Harry announced he would pick up the bill.
Meghan responded that she would pick up the bill for sending a bouquet of peonies flowers to Violet as a thank-you for matching them up.
But since then, there seems to have been a lack of relationship between the pair and the person who helped bring them together.
The last time Violet appears to have spoken of the royal couple was in 2018, when she refused to deny if she was responsible for introducing them.
Violet Von Westenholz and Poppy Delevingne at a party at Soho House on March 22, 2011
Meghan at Wimbledon on July 4, 2016
When Harry met Meghan, she was still working as an actress on the US TV show Suits
Prince Harry on July 14, 2016, almost two weeks after meeting Meghan and going on two dates
Meghan stars as Rachel Zane in the hit American TV show Suits
Meghan starred as Rachel Zane alongside co-star Patrick J. Adams, who played Michael Ross, from 2011 to 2018. Adams recently said he was ‘not in touch’ with Meghan
Meghan played Patrick J. Adams’ love interest Rachel Zane
During rumours at the time, she told the Daily Telegraph: ‘I might leave that for other people to say [who it is].
‘It’s a great story and I am sure they are going to be very happy together. I am just happy they are really happy. They are great together.’
Violet appears to have been a popular member of the London elite social scene, she was described in a 2017 fashion blog as having the ‘unteachable skill’ of making ‘whoever she is with feel completely comfortable, at ease and at home’.
The blog added: ‘Her kindness, approachability and warmth will make you feel like an old friend within seconds of meeting her and, no doubt, have you sharing your inner most secrets.’
She did not go to university, but has worked with brands such as Mulberry, Dolce and Gabbana and Bottega.
Violet also appears to be friendly with Millie Mackintosh, who was famously ghosted by Meghan before her marriage to Prince Harry.
When Meghan first started putting down roots in the UK in 2016, the former Made in Chelsea star was said to be one of the Duchess’ best friends.
Left: Millie Mackintosh, who was said to be ’embarrassed’ not to get an invite to the Royal Wedding, pictured in February 2023. Right: Meghan pictured in December 2022
Bonded: Speaking on her podcast , the Made In Chelsea star Millie Mackintosh revealed she became pals with the Suits star after they met at a hotel event in Turkey. Millie is pictured here on the 2015 trip
Ms Mackintosh is said to have met Meghan shortly before the actress began dating Harry in July 2016.
In February 2018, a royal insider told the Daily Mail that the reality star had been helping Meghan to organise the wedding – and was even predicting she might be chosen as a bridesmaid. However, the star did not end up being given an invite.
In May 2023, Millie revealed that she felt ‘snubbed’ by Meghan and described her last message from the Duchess as being ‘abrupt’.
But, despite the apparent cooling of relations between the royal couple and Violet, she appears to be getting on with her life.
In 2019 she had a daughter called Lyra with her restaurant manager boyfriend Archie Seymour. A picture of her and the child was shared by her friend Olivia Buckingham on Instagram in July.
When Seymour was asked by the Daily Mail in 2018 if they were engaged, he replied: ‘No, but it’s all a question of time.’ It is not known if the pair did eventually get married.
Violet keeps a low profile on social media but her close friend Olivia Buckingham, who is editor at Hong Kong Tatler, shared photos of the proud new mother on Instagram in July 2019
But as the years have passed, Violet remains tight-lipped about her current relationship with the royal couple and keeps her social media private.
For their part, Harry and Meghan have made no comment on the friend who once played a very important role in their life.
It was recently reported that Harry seems to be increasingly lonely in California and counts on a former royal protection officer, to whom he is now thought to pay thousands of pounds a day for security, as his ‘best friend’.
David Langdown served as a close protection officer at the Metropolitan Police for 16 years and was assigned to Harry for about a decade – accompanying Harry on his infamous trip to Las Vegas where he had a pool party surrounded by bikini-clad women.
Harry’s 40th birthday bash last month was reported to largely feature Meghan’s Hollywood pals on its guestlist.
